Link: First men, now boys are ‘Going Their Own Way’ April 1, 20176:58am (www.news.com.au)
The article starts off reasonably enough, at least it doesn’t seem to be just another shaming piece ridiculing men for rejecting the status quo. It seems to be generally sympathetic to what boys and young men face. There’s even a good general statement of MGTOW purpose:
“Essentially, MGTOW is a statement about living life your way rather than trying to make a woman happy or being a slave to cultural expectations,” one NSW member says.
“This isn’t about a specific rule book, more a mindset, although there are purists in the movement who are the most extreme and avoid women entirely. There’s a growing number of men who’ve had enough — enough of feminism and enough of being told they have to work for a greater good, which doesn’t actually exist.”
That much is refreshing. Most articles just dismiss MGTOW as misogyny and woman-bashing, and virtually all of them make the mistake of presenting MGTOW as an organization, usually with a whole bunch of silly rules taken from some self-appointed “authoritative” website, rather than portraying it as what is is- a movement. A movement has no rules, because it needs no rules, only a direction… but this apparent new understanding is then immediately contradicted by calling the quoted source a “member”.
Someone is confused here. There are no MGTOW membership cards, no dues and no fund-raising bake sales. It’s a movement.
This ends with the statement that the “greater good” doesn’t actually exist, which I happen to agree with. Look at hive insects, which are a huge success as an evolutionary strategy, seemingly satisfying the “common good” concept, but don’t provide a single individual life worth living… but then in the very next sentence we get:
“Start looking into this “manosphere” and it’s like going down a rabbit hole — happiness here is supposedly freedom.”
Um, wait… am I missing something here? Is there evidence I’ve missed that happiness is actually slavery?
We get a couple of comparatively mild versions of the usual horror stories to illustrate that there really is a problem, which is fine, but then, for real authority on the subject of men, we (of course) have to trot out a woman:
Author and psychologist Meredith Fuller says, “None of these views surprise me because I hear them all the time — each time it strikes me as incredibly sad. We have a younger generation who are chaotic and rudderless; they have no role models, no mentors and no sense of where they fit into society.
“It’s crucial that we encourage our children find a mentor — a teacher, a relative or someone who teaches them sport — someone who they can communicate with, talk honestly to and learn skills about healthy relationships,” she says.
Really? Could it possibly be that they have no role models because we just spent a few decades self-righteously removing every single positive male role model in all media, and replacing them mostly with women- that is, mostly with improbably powerful, brilliant and noble women who physically kick men around and mentally show them up as stupid caricatures? Could it be a result of the fact that we now accept a level of viciousness in portrayals of men in media that hasn’t been accepted for any other group since WWII propaganda ended? Some quiet evening just try watching any three hours of television that’s been created in the past decade or so, then try reversing the genders and see how equitable it seems.
Mentors? Could it be that the boys and young men don’t have mentors because the teachers, relatives or “someone who teaches them sport” (er, that would be a “coach”, ma’am) who could have filled that role have now been trained by society to be constantly afraid being branded as perverts and child molesters for just spending any time with boys? I’ve talked with several men who are nostalgic about the history and legacy of the Boy Scouts, for example, but actively avoid associating with boys, or anyone under-age, in any role, just out of self-preservation. They know that now nothing ever needs to be proved, of course, if you are in a position to even be accused your reputation and life can be ruined.
Now what a surprise it is that the boys can’t find mentors. Any male who dares take on that role, even briefly and entirely within public view is regarded with huge suspicion by mothers who have been convinced by our now feminist-dominated society that all males are barely-restrained monsters who are after their children.
Duh.
Ms. Fuller winds up with:
“We need to get a focus back on having respect for other human beings, for partnerships, loving bonds and trust rather than simply seeing what you can get out of a relationship.
“Children need to learn that sense of give and take; they need to be taught about delayed gratification. Life is not all about self; it’s not all about making yourself happy instantly and constantly. And it’s not about running away from the opposite sex, it’s about learning to communicate effectively and genuine caring.”
Wait… isn’t this pretty much the opposite of what society has encouraged women to think for more than a half-century now? It certainly seemed to be “all about making yourself happy instantly and constantly” for all these past decades while women were doing it. In fact that’s almost been the rallying call of feminism, “me first, last and always”, but now when men consider it, it’s suddenly, certainly not acceptable.
Not to mention the most obvious contradiction: For decades we’ve been told over and over that women do not need men, for anything, ever. “A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle”, remember? But now, suddenly, men not needing women, men not serving women’s needs with no regard to their own is a huge problem, and must be stopped.
Really? Did you really think bicycles need fish more? People, this is not a reaction against feminism, this is complying with feminism, giving women exactly what they said, and still say, that they want. That’s largely the absence of males- who, having been criticized, lambasted and ridiculed for being male, having learned well that they are not needed and not wanted, are now being criticized, lambasted and ridiculed for not participating.
Ladies, you either need men or your don’t. Society either needs men or it doesn’t. If you don’t need men, then doing without us must not be a problem, and our non-participation in any way, in any numbers, shouldn’t bother anyone. The fact that you can’t have this one both ways is not our doing, so blaming us won’t help this time.
So, even though the article started out with some promise, we end up with the same old double standard. The exact solution that has been pushed on women for a couple of generations now, being strong, independent and prioritizing themselves first, is now completely inappropriate and wrong when the gender roles are reversed. Men are supposed to work to provide, to obey, to accept any amount of ridicule, demonization and derision with quiet stoicism, and then be meekly cast aside when no longer useful as providers or when women just get bored. Their role in society is to lie down under the railroad tracks to help the trains run on time, to sacrifice themselves “for the common good” like the hive insects. That’s their path to self-fulfillment.
I can’t imagine why these boys aren’t happy, facing the future that you’re offering them.
Remember this? “… it’s like going down a rabbit hole — happiness here is supposedly freedom.”
I think that’s a rare slip of the mask, an accidentally-permitted glimpse of underlying truth. In this brave new feminist world apparently the future source of happiness for these boys really is supposed to be slavery, just as the article implies by ridiculing the idea that happiness is freedom.
Okay, for one moment I’ll yield to the pressure and assume the role that the article seems to be saying that older males should. For the length of one word I’ll risk being regarded as a potential monster for taking any interest in them at all, step into that now-very-vacant male mentor role and offer my own sincere advice to these boys on how best to conduct themselves in the future that’s being prepared for them:
Run.
“But I reckon I got to light out for the territory ahead of the rest, because Aunt Sally she’s going to adopt me and sivilize me, and I can’t stand it. I been there before.”
Huckleberry Finn, by Mark Twain
– Robert the Wombat